Scientists Determine Al Gore is Cause of Global Warming

A group of highly educated scientists have determined that the cause of global warming is Al Gore himself. Massive amounts of methane, they say, are released from Al Gore each day, up to 400,000 cubic meters of the stuff. When asked about this, Gore allegedly replied that he was making up the difference with offsets, such as only taking one jet plane trip per day and keeping his heated swimming pool down to a balmy 85 degrees in the wintertime. He is also cutting down on his daily Cashew Chicken allotment. Good for you, Al !

Scientology Capitalizes on VT Shootings

OK, a little piece of news this morning, which is not a surprise to me, but is upsetting. Scientology has 20 “ministers” in Blacksburg, VA, to assist with “grief counseling” for people who may have been traumatized by the shootings that recently occurred at the Virginia Tech campus. Here’s the link:

They did the same thing after 9/11 for NY firefighters and policemen, and after Hurricane Katrina as well. What they are actually doing is proselytizing. They managed to hook 2 firefighters into their cult group, who subsequently left their wives and children in order to pursue Scientologies’ teachings. Scientology teaches that should any person’s family oppose their teachings, they must be “disconnected,” a fact (among many) that is not made clear until the person is well established within the cult.

One of their front groups is the Citizens Commission on Human Rights, a thinly veiled façade, which is used to enable the church of Scientology to have access where it ordinarily would not, in unsuspecting people’s lives.

Tom Cruise is one of Hollywood’s unofficial spokesmen for Scientology. I am most upset with him for lying to the public by claiming that Scientology is compatible with Christianity. It most assuredly is not, the two being mutually exclusive. Let the truth be known!

Anger Management

[Inset-Superhero Mr. Furious, who has the super power of becoming VERY ANGRY]

I seem to be writing a lot about blowing things up, knocking people out and all other sorts of other damaging, hurting, and pillaging. The thought occurred to me this morning, “What are you angry about?” Yes, all the sticks of dynamite, the nuclear bombs, the fight with Rocky- they are all done tongue-in-cheek. However, am I using these as proxies to express feelings that don’t have another way of coming out? I see this with the children I teach each day. Sometimes they lash out, and they don’t know why. Something is upsetting them. Maybe the same thing is happening to me.

Well, I certainly did not feel angry. I am not angry with Rosie O'Donnell or any of the others personally, I don’t even know them. Perhaps I am angry because I am upset with what they represent. Let’s examine this:

I am angry at Rosie O’Donnell because she stated on “The View” that the greatest threat to our country was Christianity. Never mind Islamic extremists that fly planes into buildings, lop people’s heads off, and take people hostage, threatening to kill them unless they deny Christ and convert to Islam. It’s those Christians we need to look out for.

I am angry at Donald Rumsfeld because of his stance on UFO’s. When he visited Iraq, he had a question and answer session with the troops. One soldier asked about the truth of UFO’s, he replied with anger, “You don’t have the need to know!” as he stormed away. "The need to know WHAT?" is my response. This is on the record, by the way. No thanks to the media for playing possum with this story, which if true, is the second most important story in the history of humanity. In my mind, he is part of a system that is corrupt; by consolidating knowledge which rightfully belongs to the people of the world, as it affects us all.

I am angry with Hillary Clinton for her socialistic views on how our country should be changed. I am angry with her for attempting to manipulate us by not portraying herself as she truly is, a callous woman who will stop at nothing to obtain power. I am angry with her for her views on human life, by which my tax dollars are used in the eradication of tiny, helpless unborn babies, in the name of a philosophy that lies to us. They are not human, indeed!

I am angry with TV shows that insult my intelligence.

Dear God,
Here I am, sitting here sort of simmering about things that are completely out of my hands. Please forgive me for not remembering that You are in control. Please forgive me for not relying on You completely. In as much as I am able, I give these things to you in surrender. Take this anger from me, please, for it is not good. I trust You and believe You. You have told me in Your word that it is ok to be angry, but not to allow that anger to turn to sin. I am stewing when I should be praying. Let me see with eyes of understanding, not necessarily of other things, but of how you want me to be. I submit all of myself to You.

I love You,
Glenn =)

Rocky VII The Movie

Sorry for the delay between posts. I have been busy writing, just not for the blog. Been getting in touch with old friends, you know how that is.

Well, for some reason I am on a Rocky rampage. After watching Rocky VI, I ordered the original with the extra disk full of commentaries on how the script was written and the background story from Sly himself on the making of the original Rocky movie. So, in honor of such a great movie, I am going to try my hand at writing for the Rocky franchise, from the ending of Rocky VI. As Mr. Stallone has officially hung up the gloves, I sincerely hope he won’t mind.

Cue: Rocky Theme Music- Trumpet Fanfare (for extra realism, open an additional internet connection and paste this link: http://rocky.ubi.com/ Make sure your sound is turned up. Then come back and read the read the column)

[ROCKY VII in bold white letters scrolls across the screen. Then we see a figure in silhouette, wearing boxing gloves and pushing a four-legged wheeled walker. Fade in to the end of Rocky VI where dozens of assistants, promoters and managers are milling about in the ring, waiting for the announcement of the winner of the bout.]

Lampley: Welcome back, Jim Lampley with Larry Merchant here, your ring announcers for this fight. Larry, how did you score the fight?
Merchant: It was extremely close, Jim. Mason “the Line” Dixon scored many times to the head, and Rocky was tremendous with his signature work to Dixon’s torso.

Lampley: Many celebrity and political names are gathered at ringside anxiously awaiting the decision. There’s Hillary Clinton chatting amiably with Donald Rumsfeld of all people. Barney the Dinosaur is in the new children’s area, a unique innovation for this auditorium. There’s something to get the whole family involved.
Merchant: Yes, and none other than Donald Trump and Rosie O’Donnell are here as well. Think we could get them in the ring?
Lampley: Sign them up! There’s Will Wheaton, Wesley Crusher of Star Trek fame. Ah, here’s the announcer with the decision we have all been waiting for….

Announcer: The winner, by split decision… is… MASON the LINE DIXON!!!

[At this point Trump enters the ring and grabs the mike from the announcer]

Trump: It’s a set up! This fight has been rigged against Rocky! We have tape of one of the judges taking a payoff!

[The crowd erupts in turmoil. Rosie, not to be outdone, jumps into the ring as well.]

Lampley: [shouting into the mike to be heard] The crowd is going nuts! Rosie O’Donnell has now entered the ring. Rocky… Rocky is swinging at anything that moves! He’s turned into a complete animal! Rosie is… ROCKY JUST DECKED ROSIE! She came up to him flailing her arms and Rocky scored with a solid right hook! Rosie O’Donnell is down on the mat….

Merchant: Better look out, Jim. He’s leaving the ring.
Lampley: Wesley Crusher, er, Will Wheaton is in the way. He doesn’t see him! Look out!
Crowd: Oooo!
Merchant: Wheaton just took a PUNISHING left hook as he turned around! He must have flown 8 feet!

TRYING HARD NOWWW! IT’S SO HARD NOWWW! TRYING HARD NOWWW!

Lampley: Rocky is making his way around the ring to the VIP section. Hillary Clinton is approaching him with her hands clasped. DON’T DO IT….
Crowd: Oooo!
Merchant: Well, so much for hitting women….
Lampley: Rumsfeld has jumped to her defense! Now Rocky is tearing into him! RIGHT! RIGHT! LEFT! RIGHT! RIGHT! RIGHT! LEFT! RIGHT! LEFT! Rumsfeld is a HUMAN PUNCHING BAG!
Merchant: Guess those glasses didn’t help much….

FIGHTING HARD NOWWW! IT’S SO HARD NOWWW! FIGHTING HARD NOWWW!

Lampley: Rumsfeld is DOWN! People are scattering, clogging the exits! It’s absolute mayhem here!

Rocky: Adrienne! Adrienne! ADRIEEEEENNE!!!!

Merchant: Rocky is calling for his wife…
Lampley: Didn’t she die a few years ago?
Merchant: One moment. Barney… oh, no. Barney the Dinosaur is running down the isle with his arms outstretched.

Rocky: ADRIEEEEEEEENNE!!!

Lampley: Barney takes a massive left to the gut! He’s doubled over! Rocky…
Crowd: Oooo!
Lampley: Rocky just hit Barney so hard he flipped over backwards. Barney has been DECAPITATED!
Merchant: Looks like just the costume head, Jim.

FLYING HIGH NOWWW!!! FLYING HIIIGH!!! HIIIIIIGH!!!!

Rocky: ADRIEEEEEEEENNE!!!!

Lampley: Rocky is just standing there crying. Now he’s… HE’S DOWN! HE JUST FELL OVER ON THE FLOOR! ROCKY’S DOWN!!!
Merchant: Medical teams are scrambling to him. A wary crowd is gathering around where he fell.
Lampley: Looks like they are doing CPR…. Rocky Balboa, after discovering his last fight was rigged, retaliated against any coming near him, causing catastrophe to erupt….
Merchant: He’s dead, Jim.

[Scroll back, with the scene widening. Medical teams are working on Rocky in futility. Fade to black. Still grayscale shots of Rocky courting Adrienne from the original Rocky cycle as the theme music reprises and the end credits roll.]

THE END

G.Houtchens
Armchair coach
Amateur historian

The Jellyfish of Micronesia

There is an amazing spectacle that occurs in the islands of Micronesia, northeast of Australia and northwest of the Marshall and Soloman Islands. There are lakes in these islands which are cut off from the ocean, except for small fissures in the rocks in the base of the islands that lead to fresh saltwater. Jellyfish were trapped in these lakes and over the years they have adapted to their environments. They survive in symbiosis with algae, which inhabit their bodies and produce food for them through photosynthesis. Additionally, because they no longer have to compete for food or survive predatory species, they have lost the ability to sting. They are the stingless jellyfish.

Jellyfish are not known for their brainpower, specifically because they have no brain whatsoever. Instead, they have a ganglion of nerve cells that help them to coordinate pulsations and to detect when prey have blundered into their tentacles and that’s about it.

The jellyfish in Jellyfish Lake migrate from one side to the other with the movement of the sun to maximize the amount of time their algae co-inhabitants have to photosynthesize in the sunlight. That’s pretty smart, in my own humble opinion, when they have no brain. They are in their own niche, their own place in their habitat (we are currently studying ecology in class) and have value as a unique and inspirational species. One can swim amongst them in awe of their beauty and grace. (A school of jellyfish is known as a smack).

Now because they have their place and because they are organisms with intrinsic value, what does that say about all living things? Shall we destroy these jellyfish by whatever means we choose because of the fact that they have no brain? (I know, I know, I made a joke about dynamiting jellyfish in my article “Look at the Little Jellyfish;” read on for what I am getting at.) No? Leave the jellyfish alone? Oh, well it would be wrong then, for us to blow all these jellyfish to kingdom come in bits of writhing little pieces, like a mad Al Qaeda ecologist, but its ok for us to kill a human when their brain no longer functions properly, because of their “quality of life.” I am alluding to the case of Terry Schaivo.

There was a movie that came out about 15 years ago that starred Robin Williams called “Awakenings.” In it, a number of people who had brain damage due to encephalitis (infection of the cerebrospinal fluid that surrounds the brain) were hospitalized at a 24 hour in patient clinic where Williams worked as a doctor. These patients were vegetables. They were responsive to very little. Williams decides (without authorization) to treat these patients with a mega dose of a new drug after initial tests failed. What occurred was remarkable. The patients started waking up from their vegetative state! After “falling asleep” for decades, these patients were laughing, talking, singing and enjoying life again. Regrettably, soon after this occurred the patients began building a tolerance to this drug, and began to fall asleep again, going back into their vegetative state. I shall never forget one scene between Robert DeNiro and Williams. Deniro tells Williams, touchingly, that when he was asleep, he was aware. He was there. He simply did not have the ability to respond.

Here is the deal: when the state starts making decisions for others on their behalf, terminating their existence because of their “quality of life,” a line is drawn. The problem with this is that THE LINE HAS A TENDENCY TO MOVE.
Your brain no longer functions properly. What quality of life is that?
You are over 80 years old. What quality of life is that?
You can no longer function in society. What quality of life is that?
You are an unwanted infant. What quality of life is that?
You are no longer productive. What quality of life is that?
You have the wrong genetic profile. What quality of life is that?

All life has value, and there is a greater line that has been drawn. Shall we embrace truth, or in the “enlightenment” of our philosophy, snuff out the lives of our fellow humans?

In doing so, we destroy ourselves.

The Trouble with Dr. Mike Adams

One of the things that I do occasionally is to stroll by the conservative website of townhall.com. Made up of many articles by the countries leading conservative thinkers and radio personalities, it is a bastion of pragmatism. One of the writers I follow is a satirist named Mike Adams, who is a professor of criminal law at the University of North Carolina, Wilmington. Adams (and I hope he will forgive me for referring to him by using his last name) discusses topics that would often get overlooked by mainstream media, thus my attraction to his writings. He often points out hypocrisy on predominantly liberal college campuses, in politics and society, and is extremely intelligent.

He has an ongoing struggle with the campus administration, whose hand he often bites, with scathing wit, to put it mildly. Here is a link to his archives: http://www.townhall.com/Columnists/MikeSAdams .

As I was reading his latest column today, something troubled me in the back of my mind. It was like an itch I could not scratch. So I began pondering, much as Winnie the Pooh is want to do. I pondered and pondered. (Winnie the Pooh is a bit thinner than I, so I take longer to figure things out.) To summarize, the column was about Adams’ employer making an official statement about Adams’ writings, and his counter claims. The university basically stated that Dr. Adams writings were deplorable and did not express the official view of the university. One would think that given the number of times Adams has lampooned his employer, this statement was to be expected, liberal enclave or not.

Adams was having none of it, though, and picked up the phone to take up his argument with the administration. He was surprised when the person he was speaking with questioned his Christianity. (Perhaps it would have been better phrased, “I question the Christianity of your writings.”) Adams asked the administrator to give him an example, and she could not.

Here is where I step in. Dr. Adams, your writings are not reflective of a walk in Christ for several reasons. The primary one is this: you are always right. You are never, ever wrong. Ever! Pride is a sin. Humility is a virtue. Even Neal Boortz, as annoying as he is, will admit to sometimes being wrong and has even apologized (not satirically) on occasion. Try examining yourself with that rapier wit of yours, and making the results public. Use the words you have used against others on yourself. The results would not be pretty, I would think. “In as much as you have done it to the least of these, you have done it unto me.” I am as guilty of this as you are, Dr. Adams, for I have criticized Michael Vick in a very unfavorable light, in a public forum (my blog). Does he deserve criticism? Yes, but not the way I wrote it, at least some of the things I wrote.

In retrospect, Dr. Adam’s writings remind me somewhat of the young, hurt, angry intellectual who has been let loose to write about the schoolyard bully, or anyone else he happens to disagree with. He simply does not stop. He does not know where to draw the line and say, enough is enough. The put downs, the accusations, the thinly-veiled cutting remarks are not what I would consider to be Christian writing.

Adams’ article continues by stating that the university has complained to him about the time it has to spend answering complaints about his free speech rights. (I am guessing this has to do with what he says in his columns.) Dr. Adams, you would be correct to say that freedom of speech for liberals on many college campuses today is protected, while freedom of speech for conservatives is not. You would be incorrect to say that you are protected by the consequences of your free speech rights; namely, an angry employer.

PS. After searching for other relevant information on the web, I found that CollegeJay expressed my views much better than I. Here is the link to his article:
http://collegejay.blogspot.com/2006/08/thoughts-on-mike-s-adams-aka-live-it.html

Frankenstein Redeux

I am very upset but hardly surprised by an article I read this morning. Dr. Joseph Mengele, also known as “The Angel of Death,” was a Nazi SS officer and chief medical officer at the infirmary at Auschwitz in WWII. He blatantly ignored all ethical considerations with his inhuman eugenic experiments on those imprisoned there. Among his atrocities were attempting to change eye color by injecting chemicals into children’s eyes, amputations, sterilizations and shock treatments. Most who volunteered for his special detail thinking to avoid harsh labor died horrific deaths.

Now there is another doctor who is following his lead, and follows the creed, “if it can be done that is cause enough.” Esmail Zanjani, of the University of Nevada, has spent 5 million pounds (7 to 8 million dollars, no doubt made up of grants) and 7 years infusing human cells into sheep fetuses. He now has a sheep that has 15% human cells. The purpose: to make these animals human enough for the purposes of transplantation of organs. Link: http://www.mailonsunday.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=444436&in_page_id=1770&in_a_source “New Scientists Create Sheep That’s 15% Human”

This research mimics in a reverse sense the macabre horror tale written by Robert Louis Stevenson, “The Island of Dr. Moreau,” where humans were turned into half breed animals, all for the purpose of the worship of the study of science. Only in this case, the nightmare has become a reality. Those who espouse such positions (all science is ethical if it can be used to treat disease or prolong life) such as Michael J. Fox, contend that genetic research of this type could offer the possibility of help for millions. Admittedly, it is easy for one such as myself who does not suffer from Parkinson’s disease to judge. My question to Mr. Fox would be, “At what price sir, do we compromise our humanity in our quest to help others?”

A thought that is troubling to Christians is that we are already killing 1 million people in our country each year, subsidized by our tax dollars. We are making Mengele look like a choirboy. We don’t want to open another Pandora’s box on top of that. We are individually and collectively responsible for the actions that occur in our country. The science of Dr. Moreau, once fiction, has arrived. I am concerned that the lessons of Shelley’s Frankenstein, the monster run amok, are banging on the exit of the lab, while those who run their experiments with tunnel vision seeking fame, prestige and fortune, remain oblivious.