May I Help You, Centurion?

Many years ago in Israel, Centurions roamed the streets of Jerusalem in one of many occupied countries, enforcing dominion with soldiers who had authority to basically do as they pleased in administering Rome’s laws. Essentially this boiled down to roaming mobs of armored Roman soldiers who went about extorting people in shakedowns for “taxes” and in some cases, I am sure, generally just being bullies, as power has the tendency to corrupt. This infuriated the Jews who saw their money going to support pagan works in Rome.

Much the same thing is happening today, in my own eyes. Officers who used to go by the vow “to protect and serve” instead have become revenue raising agents for the state. For example, in Denver, motorcycle cops have received an order to write 2 traffic tickets per hour on duty (regardless of whether said citizens were breaking the law or not.) This is not in the public interest, but simply to pad some coffers in a city municipality. One would think that such duties could instead be spent protecting citizens instead of robbing them. Here’s the link to this story:

http://cbs4denver.com/topstories/local_story_121234857.html

Jesus did not address these political issues, which were hot topics of the times. Rather, he took to himself Matthew, a tax collector, to be one of his disciples. In my own mind, he saw beyond the earthly power of political institutions. God’s kingdom resides in the hearts of men, and it was here He sought to bring His ministry.

Additionally, I am very concerned with the actions of the LAPD over the weekend. A peaceful demonstration for the rights of illegal immigrants was occurring in a park there, with thousands of people attending. (I am strongly against illegal immigration, as many more Americans have been killed by illegal immigrants than have been killed in Iraq, but forget the biased news reporting on THAT story.) Unarmed people were fired upon with rubber bullets by a “gang” of police that were telling the demonstrators to break up. Reporters who were on the scene were unlawfully ordered to put their cameras away and in one instance a female cameraman was attacked with a billy club from behind. Other cameras were seized, I understand. Here is the link to the video, it’s rather chilling:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UFdNkXJMH9A

Long gone are the days of squeaky clean Adam-12, where officers actually served the people, although perhaps this view is simply just the sanitized perception of the way things were supposed to be, a Leave It to Beaver/Truman Show sort of thing. One of the first shows to question government’s motives was “The Prisoner,” and I hope to discuss this show in one of my future articles. (Outstanding article- click and read it!)

G.Houtchens
Armchair coach
Amateur historian

PS Thanks to the FunTimesGuide for the picture. I used MS Paint to insert the Centurion.

Like A Little Bird

Last Sunday morning, 8 am. I am sitting in the house and the question hits me again. Do I go to church? One would think that such a decision would be a simple one- go if you want to. It’s not so easy for me. I don’t want to be motivated by condemnation. I don’t want to be motivated by thoughts of myself just being selfish and not worth sharing myself with others. I don’t want to be motivated by any form of coercion or legalistic form of requirement. I want to go because it is in my heart to do so. So, once more, I rock back and forth, saying, I want to go but I don’t want to. I don’t know. Maybe I have been hurt somehow. Maybe it’s a combination of things. One thing I know, Father Kurt and the folks at Christ the Redeemer have not put any stress on me for either attending or not, understanding me, I guess, in a way, better than I do myself, and for that I am grateful.

This particular morning rather than anguishing over it and winding up just picking the lesser of evils and staying home (where it’s safe!), I went to my bedroom to talk to God. So, I told Him what’s going on. Why am I in such a struggle over this thing? Why do I fret so? What’s the matter with me? Then I just sat and waited.

Eventually, I became aware of the birds outside my house singing. I went to the window and peered through the blinds, parting them with my fingers and squinting into the morning brightness. “My,” I thought. “God must surely smile at these wonderful birds who sing with such beauty.” Then the thought occurred to me. If God smiles at these birds of his creation, how much more so does He surely smile at his children who lift songs of praise to him with their lives? I saw myself then as a small bird, cooped up in my house, a birdhouse of sorts, who does not come out to sing often along with the others. When I do though, does He not see me and smile at this bird of sorts who has joined his voice with the others?

I went to church last week. Perhaps the idea of my being a sort of Cuckoo is apt, but I for one am thankful that God is not finished with me yet.

Walls

Well, after a break I am ready to write again. This time I shall be choosing a topic that I am particularly sensitive to, thus the title, Walls. The story begins with part of my not quite daily devotions.

Usually I use my commute time to work to pray for those I have had the privilege to know. This includes a list of students whom I have taught over the years. These students are troubled, for one reason or another. They face differing issues of isolation, temptation, ridicule, lack of compassion, low self esteem; any number of things that affect young folks in the angst filled years of middle school. Incidentally, I see a small part of myself in each of these people that I have added to my prayer list, asking for God in His mercy to intervene in their lives, to bless them and surround them with angels to protect them and guide them to seek Him; for God’s will in their lives to be done.

Now on a recent field trip I was chatting with one of the parent chaperones, and I mentioned one of the people on my prayer list that I have been praying for for years. She replied, “Him? His bus stop is near my house and I have observed him being mercilessly teased and spat upon by his peers. He has taken to wearing a black trench coat, and I am very worried about him.”

Now this concerned me greatly. I will call this young man James. I asked if she knew how I could get in touch with him and she replied that he worked at one of the local superstores in the area. I knew I had to contact James somehow, and I wondered if I did what I would say to him.

The next day was Saturday and I hopped into the truck and began visiting local stores. I had no luck after about 90 minutes of running around. Then I found a store in Roswell, and sure enough he was working there.

“James!” I said as I found him at the register in the electronics department. “How are you? It’s SO GOOD to see you again after these many years!” We were both smiling and he seemed surprized. He was still overweight with a pale complexion and had grown a thin fuzzy beard. As I came up to the register the others who were working there wandered away, perhaps understanding that I wanted to have a few private words with my former student. The following is what I had to say to this young man, this very special person in the sight of God, and in my own heart. I had some things planned out to say, but at the moment every word fled from my thoughts, and I struggled for what to say.

James, I have good news for you, and you look like you could use some. I understand you are being picked on. However, I have been praying for you every week since you left my class in the 7^th grade. Soon, these people who torment you will be left behind when you graduate from high school, and you will be able to make a fresh start in a new place. I understand you have taken to wearing a trench coat, and I that this may represent the walls you have built to protect you from … pain. Having walls are normal, but be careful, because the walls that we build to protect us can also serve to keep us inside and isolate us. And believe it or not, even in the midst of pain, God has purpose. You see, one day, you may meet a young man who is being tormented, just as you have been. On that day, you will be able to tell him “I understand what you are going through. I know. I have been there.” Then, it will be your turn, you see, to pray for them, just as I have been praying for you. And if you ever feel like you are going to explode, like you are going to lose it, call me. I will come running. By this time we were both crying. I took my leave, and cried some more in my truck in the parking lot.

In retrospect, I realize that these words I spoke to James were meant, in a way, for me as well. For the walls that I have erected to protect myself are a prison of sorts. I have eschewed social situations in favor of isolation, to the point where I have never been married. I have been a member of the church praise team twice, and twice I have walked away without going to church for 3 months without so much as a word to anyone. People get too close to me and I become a human clam, closing up and hiding within my own house. God have mercy on me. I wonder sometimes why the folks at Christ the Redeemer have anything to do with me at all.

But I am not alone, by any means. Some people dive into their jobs, becoming consumed with the drive to acquire wealth or find self-fulfillment, at the cost of relationships in their lives. Some live out fantasy lives in online MMORPG’s, mass multiplayer online role playing games. You can name any activity, however benign, and there will be those who dive into it to avoid pain or pursue pleasure. It’s a normal reaction found in all of us- after all, that’s how we teach our pets to become housetrained. Some folks even avoid pleasure and pursue pain, in an attempt to purge themselves of whatever issues they face. It’s the same thing, flipped around.

The question is, what are your walls? How did they come about, and what role do they play in your own life? Are they of a normal size, or are they exaggerated to the point of being an obstacle to future growth?

Dear God,
Hi. It’s me again. Good morning =). In as much as I am able, I give my walls to you. Come and inhabit the place they occupy, and do as You please with them in my life. Help me in my weakness. Help me to love. Help me to be as You want me to be. Let me be as an open book, that in spite of my imperfections, that others might somehow see Your love through me. I love you.

Glenn =)

Scientists Determine Al Gore is Cause of Global Warming

A group of highly educated scientists have determined that the cause of global warming is Al Gore himself. Massive amounts of methane, they say, are released from Al Gore each day, up to 400,000 cubic meters of the stuff. When asked about this, Gore allegedly replied that he was making up the difference with offsets, such as only taking one jet plane trip per day and keeping his heated swimming pool down to a balmy 85 degrees in the wintertime. He is also cutting down on his daily Cashew Chicken allotment. Good for you, Al !

Scientology Capitalizes on VT Shootings

OK, a little piece of news this morning, which is not a surprise to me, but is upsetting. Scientology has 20 “ministers” in Blacksburg, VA, to assist with “grief counseling” for people who may have been traumatized by the shootings that recently occurred at the Virginia Tech campus. Here’s the link:

They did the same thing after 9/11 for NY firefighters and policemen, and after Hurricane Katrina as well. What they are actually doing is proselytizing. They managed to hook 2 firefighters into their cult group, who subsequently left their wives and children in order to pursue Scientologies’ teachings. Scientology teaches that should any person’s family oppose their teachings, they must be “disconnected,” a fact (among many) that is not made clear until the person is well established within the cult.

One of their front groups is the Citizens Commission on Human Rights, a thinly veiled façade, which is used to enable the church of Scientology to have access where it ordinarily would not, in unsuspecting people’s lives.

Tom Cruise is one of Hollywood’s unofficial spokesmen for Scientology. I am most upset with him for lying to the public by claiming that Scientology is compatible with Christianity. It most assuredly is not, the two being mutually exclusive. Let the truth be known!

Anger Management

[Inset-Superhero Mr. Furious, who has the super power of becoming VERY ANGRY]

I seem to be writing a lot about blowing things up, knocking people out and all other sorts of other damaging, hurting, and pillaging. The thought occurred to me this morning, “What are you angry about?” Yes, all the sticks of dynamite, the nuclear bombs, the fight with Rocky- they are all done tongue-in-cheek. However, am I using these as proxies to express feelings that don’t have another way of coming out? I see this with the children I teach each day. Sometimes they lash out, and they don’t know why. Something is upsetting them. Maybe the same thing is happening to me.

Well, I certainly did not feel angry. I am not angry with Rosie O'Donnell or any of the others personally, I don’t even know them. Perhaps I am angry because I am upset with what they represent. Let’s examine this:

I am angry at Rosie O’Donnell because she stated on “The View” that the greatest threat to our country was Christianity. Never mind Islamic extremists that fly planes into buildings, lop people’s heads off, and take people hostage, threatening to kill them unless they deny Christ and convert to Islam. It’s those Christians we need to look out for.

I am angry at Donald Rumsfeld because of his stance on UFO’s. When he visited Iraq, he had a question and answer session with the troops. One soldier asked about the truth of UFO’s, he replied with anger, “You don’t have the need to know!” as he stormed away. "The need to know WHAT?" is my response. This is on the record, by the way. No thanks to the media for playing possum with this story, which if true, is the second most important story in the history of humanity. In my mind, he is part of a system that is corrupt; by consolidating knowledge which rightfully belongs to the people of the world, as it affects us all.

I am angry with Hillary Clinton for her socialistic views on how our country should be changed. I am angry with her for attempting to manipulate us by not portraying herself as she truly is, a callous woman who will stop at nothing to obtain power. I am angry with her for her views on human life, by which my tax dollars are used in the eradication of tiny, helpless unborn babies, in the name of a philosophy that lies to us. They are not human, indeed!

I am angry with TV shows that insult my intelligence.

Dear God,
Here I am, sitting here sort of simmering about things that are completely out of my hands. Please forgive me for not remembering that You are in control. Please forgive me for not relying on You completely. In as much as I am able, I give these things to you in surrender. Take this anger from me, please, for it is not good. I trust You and believe You. You have told me in Your word that it is ok to be angry, but not to allow that anger to turn to sin. I am stewing when I should be praying. Let me see with eyes of understanding, not necessarily of other things, but of how you want me to be. I submit all of myself to You.

I love You,
Glenn =)

Rocky VII The Movie

Sorry for the delay between posts. I have been busy writing, just not for the blog. Been getting in touch with old friends, you know how that is.

Well, for some reason I am on a Rocky rampage. After watching Rocky VI, I ordered the original with the extra disk full of commentaries on how the script was written and the background story from Sly himself on the making of the original Rocky movie. So, in honor of such a great movie, I am going to try my hand at writing for the Rocky franchise, from the ending of Rocky VI. As Mr. Stallone has officially hung up the gloves, I sincerely hope he won’t mind.

Cue: Rocky Theme Music- Trumpet Fanfare (for extra realism, open an additional internet connection and paste this link: http://rocky.ubi.com/ Make sure your sound is turned up. Then come back and read the read the column)

[ROCKY VII in bold white letters scrolls across the screen. Then we see a figure in silhouette, wearing boxing gloves and pushing a four-legged wheeled walker. Fade in to the end of Rocky VI where dozens of assistants, promoters and managers are milling about in the ring, waiting for the announcement of the winner of the bout.]

Lampley: Welcome back, Jim Lampley with Larry Merchant here, your ring announcers for this fight. Larry, how did you score the fight?
Merchant: It was extremely close, Jim. Mason “the Line” Dixon scored many times to the head, and Rocky was tremendous with his signature work to Dixon’s torso.

Lampley: Many celebrity and political names are gathered at ringside anxiously awaiting the decision. There’s Hillary Clinton chatting amiably with Donald Rumsfeld of all people. Barney the Dinosaur is in the new children’s area, a unique innovation for this auditorium. There’s something to get the whole family involved.
Merchant: Yes, and none other than Donald Trump and Rosie O’Donnell are here as well. Think we could get them in the ring?
Lampley: Sign them up! There’s Will Wheaton, Wesley Crusher of Star Trek fame. Ah, here’s the announcer with the decision we have all been waiting for….

Announcer: The winner, by split decision… is… MASON the LINE DIXON!!!

[At this point Trump enters the ring and grabs the mike from the announcer]

Trump: It’s a set up! This fight has been rigged against Rocky! We have tape of one of the judges taking a payoff!

[The crowd erupts in turmoil. Rosie, not to be outdone, jumps into the ring as well.]

Lampley: [shouting into the mike to be heard] The crowd is going nuts! Rosie O’Donnell has now entered the ring. Rocky… Rocky is swinging at anything that moves! He’s turned into a complete animal! Rosie is… ROCKY JUST DECKED ROSIE! She came up to him flailing her arms and Rocky scored with a solid right hook! Rosie O’Donnell is down on the mat….

Merchant: Better look out, Jim. He’s leaving the ring.
Lampley: Wesley Crusher, er, Will Wheaton is in the way. He doesn’t see him! Look out!
Crowd: Oooo!
Merchant: Wheaton just took a PUNISHING left hook as he turned around! He must have flown 8 feet!

TRYING HARD NOWWW! IT’S SO HARD NOWWW! TRYING HARD NOWWW!

Lampley: Rocky is making his way around the ring to the VIP section. Hillary Clinton is approaching him with her hands clasped. DON’T DO IT….
Crowd: Oooo!
Merchant: Well, so much for hitting women….
Lampley: Rumsfeld has jumped to her defense! Now Rocky is tearing into him! RIGHT! RIGHT! LEFT! RIGHT! RIGHT! RIGHT! LEFT! RIGHT! LEFT! Rumsfeld is a HUMAN PUNCHING BAG!
Merchant: Guess those glasses didn’t help much….

FIGHTING HARD NOWWW! IT’S SO HARD NOWWW! FIGHTING HARD NOWWW!

Lampley: Rumsfeld is DOWN! People are scattering, clogging the exits! It’s absolute mayhem here!

Rocky: Adrienne! Adrienne! ADRIEEEEENNE!!!!

Merchant: Rocky is calling for his wife…
Lampley: Didn’t she die a few years ago?
Merchant: One moment. Barney… oh, no. Barney the Dinosaur is running down the isle with his arms outstretched.

Rocky: ADRIEEEEEEEENNE!!!

Lampley: Barney takes a massive left to the gut! He’s doubled over! Rocky…
Crowd: Oooo!
Lampley: Rocky just hit Barney so hard he flipped over backwards. Barney has been DECAPITATED!
Merchant: Looks like just the costume head, Jim.

FLYING HIGH NOWWW!!! FLYING HIIIGH!!! HIIIIIIGH!!!!

Rocky: ADRIEEEEEEEENNE!!!!

Lampley: Rocky is just standing there crying. Now he’s… HE’S DOWN! HE JUST FELL OVER ON THE FLOOR! ROCKY’S DOWN!!!
Merchant: Medical teams are scrambling to him. A wary crowd is gathering around where he fell.
Lampley: Looks like they are doing CPR…. Rocky Balboa, after discovering his last fight was rigged, retaliated against any coming near him, causing catastrophe to erupt….
Merchant: He’s dead, Jim.

[Scroll back, with the scene widening. Medical teams are working on Rocky in futility. Fade to black. Still grayscale shots of Rocky courting Adrienne from the original Rocky cycle as the theme music reprises and the end credits roll.]

THE END

G.Houtchens
Armchair coach
Amateur historian