Mood and Tone

Mood and Tone

This topic is being addressed because two of my editors each had an issue with the use of tone in my novel. In one case, it was the inclusion of an antagonist which was monstrous, even titanic in size and appearance. In the other, it was the sparse use of dark humor found in my novel which usually takes itself seriously.

But before we begin to discuss these ideas and why I over-ruled my editors on these specific issues, what is tone in writing? And what is mood? How are they different and how do writers use them?  

Mood is how the writer describes the setting. It conveys feeling about the environment in which the story takes place. This feeling is something the reader picks up on, and it should never seem to be forced. If the reader feels like he or she is being manipulated, all cards are off the table, all bets are off, and everyone loses. The introduction of feeling through mood must be… subtle. If the effects are harsh, they must be built up to.

For example, I establish mood with four sentences leading up to an action scene early in the novel. Let’s examine how this scene occurred:

I rolled the driver side window down and let the cool wind blow my hair around.

Mist floated down from above like tiny wisps caught in sweeping currents. The few people who were about hurried along huddled under umbrellas. Headlights from vehicles reflected down into the pavement as if revealing a hidden world under the streets.

First, the hero is out for a late-night drive. The cool wind is a relief and a stress reducer, but it is a false one. The imagery of whisps caught in currents gives the idea of being caught up in events well beyond one’s control (which quickly occurs!) People hurrying huddled under umbrellas allows the mind to engage and turn on the movie projector of suspension of disbelief. Most everyone equates the idea of people huddled against the rain at night with their own memories. Finally, a hidden world under the streets is revealing and instructive of the environment in which the hero is found. All the ideas written in this paragraph are unconscious, but they are effective in creating mood. And the beauty of it is, I wrote the above lines without any of these subliminal ideas in mind. Mood engages emotion through the environment.

So, now that we know what mood is, what is tone? Tone is the author of a novel expressing his thoughts about events through everything else aside from environment. Through dialog, actions, motivations, events, feelings and thoughts, and how these ideas are expressed in words. Tone does not need to always be serious, nor does it always need to be resonant and consistent throughout. However, it should be understood by the reader in order to avoid confusion.

So, where is the Tone inconsistent in my novel and where does it change? There are two specific places that a tone change occurs. The first happens after the beginning of the drama heavy second act. I was not happy that while many events had occurred, all of them involved narrative drama without a lot of action. I needed to accelerate and change the pace, ramping it up. Without this accordion-like expansion and contraction of pace, things become stale and repetitive. The writer needs to engage the reader in more than one way. So, the pace of the story needs to contract and speed up, to give the reader a downhill movement of a roller coaster. Sentences become shorter. Emotions become tighter. The tension needs to be ratcheted up a notch. Then, after the action scene, the pace needs to expand and slow down, so the reader can relax, digest and absorb the implications of what has just occurred. This expansion and contraction of pace happens throughout the story until the end of the act where the tension hits a climax.

So, to incorporate action and introduce changes in the protagonist that were necessary, I introduced an intelligent creature which resembles the Kraken of ancient myth. It is in actuality a summoned being from a different plane of existence. The “Kraken” dwarfs a lighthouse that it grips onto, but is eventually disposed of, killing a number of people our hero has met before it dies.

This deeply affects her. It causes her to re-examine her association with a group of Kindred (or vampires) who are evil in their motivations and considerations of others. She slumps home in the rain, walking, the entire experience weighing her down as she mourns for her friends. It is then that she decides that she does not wish to be a part of this group any more, that she wants to find out if she can become human again which is pivotal. This is the turning point in the story. While becoming a Kindred/vampire is getting kicked out the one-way doorway into adventure, the decision to seek her lost humanity starts here. The deaths of the hero’s friends affect her deeply.

This is why the scene had to take place and had to be included even though my brilliant setting editor, Matthew Dawkins, questioned the appearance of this creature. The ramifications of this scene affect the hero in a vital and personal way throughout the rest of the novel. One might argue it is part of her character arc.

The second objection in tone comes from a different editor, the gifted book tube critic Merphy Napier, in the third act. Normally, one wants to really crank up the tension as they approach the end of a novel. I do that. However, the use of humor can be used to reset tension, which is what it is used for in this instance. A subplot involves the possible reawakening of an ancient ancestor of Clan Malkavian, which would spell certain doom for all modern-day members of that group. I used some dark humor in resolving this subplot to remind the reader that this is an adventure and not everything need be taken with the same dire organ chord. Because it is written this way, the reader can nod, smile and take a breath before diving into the grist and momentum of the final climax of the novel. There are other examples of humor elsewhere in the novel. For example: The northern part of town has buildings that house lawyers. May they be the very first to go when the big quake hits.

I would add that I think it is important to have a sufficient denouement/epilogue to look at the world and how it has or has not changed after the events of the novel. I'd like to thank Matthew for encouraging me to extend my original ending. What happened to the protagonist? Did they survive and if so, did they get resolution? Not all story threads need to be resolved. Some questions are better left unanswered, so at least, they can be considered in the reader’s mind. Additionally, these threads might prove useful in writing a sequel, should the author like to draw inspiration from them.

G. Houtchens

Armchair coach

Amateur Historian